I will try to keep it simple. And brief (though this, knowing me, could be difficult to achieve).
This issue is something that has bothered me since I was in my teens, and I wanted to write here in Vox since I read a post where gorgeous MissScotch was day- dreaming about being a striper in Vegas (she is not,just in case you don't take the time to look at her blog (which you should) As a matter of fact, she is a very gifted furniture maker) .
Then came a couple of invites to participate in 2 amazing groups, the fact that people in Vox (at least up till now) seem to be able to discuss heavy, delicate issues either seriously in peace, giving support rather than slagging people off (which I had seen a lot in my past net life), or have a laugh with some seriously well written stuff, as it prooves recently the Vagina Monologue , so wonderfully worded by one of my newest neighbors. All these made me wanna write about this here.
So: Prostitution. Prostitutes. Sex Workers, Call Girls, Escorts. There are many other variants for the profession as in naming it. It has been there since the beginings of organized society. And allways looked down, despised, cast off (or out, wotever the grammar requires). Why?
That's my question.
One of the main reasons I broke up with my last pervy boyfriend (pervy as in fetish, kinky relationship) was coz, as he had succesfully hidden a wife and two children for over 2 and half years and the rest of the third we were only seeing each other for, say, the maximum 48 hours, 46 of which we spent engaged in sexual activities (the other 2 would be showers and some eating, as some of the eating was also whilst in said sexual activities), I decided to charge him.
Though I gave him a really good discount (my calculations based on how much a professional dominatrix charges in London by the hour, not including sexual intercourse,which he was getting, the bed & breakfast and other ermmm mini bar extras), his reaction was one I would not have expected.
He says: You are not kidding, are you? But for God sake, you are no prostitute and I am no client.!!!!
I mean, the only reason he was no client was, precisely, coz he wasn't paying. He was getting services which otherwise would have cost him an enourmous amount of money.And I'm saying services because,in the very same way he would have schedule his visit to a professional, he would schedule our encounters.We would not do anything other than staying in at mine. No dinners out, no cinemas, no theatre, exhibitions, not even markets to go shopping. That suited me fine for a while. When it didn't , I proposed a change. He didn't want that change, but still wanted to see me. Then I pass him the bill.He was outraged.
And I would have expected a different point of view, coming from someone who allegedly comes from an open minded scene, was kinda known in the group, wrote in the same websites I was writing, went to the same clubs I was going…..he had a longer "scene life* than mine….
…and if you think about the fact that our encounters involve me dressing him up as a girl, beat him to the pulp with all manner of whips, canes and other forms of torture (that was what made him tick) so…..why?
Why is a prostitute despised by a person who loves being tortured? Why is one activity worse than the other? Isn't it worse him lying to his wife and children than a woman who wants to charge for sex?
There is a general attitude towards prostitutes in all the fetish scene (at least on my experience), with people in all message boards making a point about professional dominatrixs not including sexual intercourse in their sesions……(and here we go into the discussion of *what is sex really?*, which I dont wanna go into right now)
I know a lot of prostitutes. I have had long term relationships with two of them. They are good girls, who had no opportunity or access to a better education,some did but found obstacles which stopped them finishing, some couldnt find work in their field, some were confronted with children at a very early age,but in all these cases, life took them to the path in which they choose to comercialize their bodies.
Two of my friends have gotten their children (one had 3 kids, the other 2) through good education, universities, and one of them herself, after she bought her house, studied psychology and is now one very succesfull professional therapist, the other one, after having succesfully payed all her kids education and managed to get her parents out of the misery they lived in, started a restaurant with all organic produce, quiet well know in Rio, actually.
But never mind what my friends are doing.
I know a lot of women who stay with their husbands because they pay the bills, buy nice cars, SUVs or Mercz, have nice houses and cart blanche credit cards….you know the kind ofr women I'm talking about…. Are they better than the ones that charge by the hour? Not to me.
In fact, I respect a lot more the girls who have the strenght, the courage and determination to go into the sex working life. It's not a safe life either.
Anyway. I'm disgusted by our modern society, the one where we are supposed to be open minded, but still bullies everything tabboed over 2000 years ago.
That's my rant for today!!!